Diaries of a Hogwarts Student
by Koala75
Summary: These are entries from the diaries of Wendy Lovelace - from her first year at Hogwarts, to the battle against Voldemort, and what happened afterwards.


_Dear Diary,_

_It's my first year at Hogwarts! My mother bought be a diary so I could record anything I wanted over my first year at school. I'm so excited, and I've only gotten on the train. I haven't met anyone yet, but there's a boy who asked if he could share the compartment with me. He's just sitting there, quietly. He's very cute, but I don't think I'm courageous enough to start talking. Maybe in a little bit. Oh… There's a girl asking if she could share the compartment too now. I don't mind. She looks nice._

_Well, anyway, my name is Wendy Lovelace. I never knew I was a witch, and neither did my parents. When I got my letter, we were all surprised, but my parents were able to have a meeting with my head master, and he explained everything. He gave me a gummy snake, and it could move! I was very excited then, and I'm even more excited now. For the longest time, it's felt like a dream. I'm such a lucky girl. Hogwarts sounds like fun, and I've read so much about it since my mum took me shopping in Diagon Alley. Since daddy's company took off, he was able to buy me lots of nice books, and even an owl to take with me to school. I'll be writing him and mum lots of thank you letters throughout the year._

_I know there's different houses in Hogwarts, and I've read as much as I could about them all. I think I'd like to be in Gryffindor or Ravenclaw. I've very loyal, and sometimes I'm quite brave. Then again, I've been told I'm clever for my age, and witty. I'll be happy with anything though. I'm still going to Hogwarts! I'll be closing this entry now. The food cart is here, and mum gave me some gold for treats. She's probably still laughing at the idea of Platform nine and three quarters!_

_Dear Diary,_

_This week has been hectic. I've been so busy learning how to get to my classes on time, and the names of my teachers, and countless other little things. I was sorted into Ravenclaw! I'm so happy! The feast was fantastic, and I already made friends. They were the ones who sat with me on the train. Peter Woodridge and Laura Queen. Laura's in Ravenclaw with me, but Peter was placed in Hufflepuff. I've talked to him in my spare time though, and I can already tell we're going to be friends for a long long time. The same goes for Laura. She's from a non-magical family like me!_

_Professor Flitwick is the head of my house, and I like his class a lot. He's a very nice man! I've already got the hang of the first spell he's taught us. Potions is fun as well! Professor Snape is a little mean at times, but the class is still very fun. I've always loved mixing things, though, when I was doing it at home, it was to cook with mum. I actually remember pretending to make potions at home. To think I'm here now at Hogwarts, a school for witches and wizards!_

_OH! That reminds me! I met our house ghost! I can't believe they fly around the castle! I used to be so scared of ghosts, but these are nice ones. Anyway, I'm quite tired, so I guess I'll end this entry. I'm going to fill this diary by the time school is over! I can already tell!_

_Dear Diary,_

_It's my second year at Hogwarts. I rode the train with Laura and Peter again, but this time, we were joined for a little bit by two boys. Fred and George Weasley. They're very energetic boys. I like them. Well, Peter gave me a present! He said he was sorry he forgot to mail it on my birthday, but I told him everything was fine. It's better late than never, after all! I love what he gave me - It's a pretty necklace. He knows my favorite color is blue, and this charm is the perfect shade! I hope he likes what I plan on getting him._

_Well, this year looks like it's going to be fun. Herbology sounds interesting, and I've always loved plants. Though, I don't think we'll be working with typical flowers. I'm also planning on trying out for the Quidditch team. I learned how to fly last year, and practiced a lot during my free time, though, I couldn't during the summer. Mum and Dad would've definitely noticed, and I don't think they want their neighbors witnessing too much magic from me. Plus, I recall someone saying I'm not allowed to use magic outside of school yet._

_Anyway, Peter is trying out for his House team too! Maybe we'll play against each other. That would be fun. He's such a fun person to hang out with. I've kind of had a crush on him since the middle of first year, but I don't think it's anything serious. We're just friends! I do love spending time with him though. He's always nice to everyone, and he loves to stand out. He makes me laugh all the time, and he's great with magic. Nothing seems hard for him, and he's so easy going. I just adore his personality._

_That reminds me, Laura told me she has a crush on Harry Potter! I met him the other day in my potions class, and he seemed nice. I didn't have anymore dry root, so he lent me some. Laura went crazy when I told her. I think she only has one class with him, and they don't get to talk much. It's adorable though, how she goes starry-eyed over him. I wonder if I get that way when I tell her about something Peter and I do. I hope not! She'll tease me about it forever!_

_Dear Diary,_

_It's the middle of year three, and I just can't believe how fast time has flown. I made the Quidditch team this year! I remember last year when I didn't make it. Peter made his team, and when he told me, I celebrated with him. Of course, he didn't fail to notice that I was upset over not getting the spot I wanted, and he asked his older brother, Ben, to get me some candy from Hogsmeade. That's one of my favorite memories of my second year._

_I have to say, so far, my favorite memory for this year is my first Quidditch game. It was against Gryffindor, so I had to play against Harry Potter! Laura wanted to support me, but she still has a crush on Harry, so it was difficult for her to choose. I told her to go for Harry, because I totally understand, but she still cheered me on. I scored a goal, but I also got hit by a bludger. Goodness, I've never felt such pain! I was fine though, and we ended up winning. Oliver Wood seemed really upset by that. I think it's his last year, and he desperately wants to win that Quidditch Cup. I hope the best of luck for him, even if he's an opposing team._

_Christmas time is here, and I have the perfect idea on gifts for Peter and Laura. I'm on the train home, but I'm alone in the compartment at the moment. Peter decided to stay, and Laura wanted to talk to another friend of hers. I thought it was the perfect time to pull out my diary. Well, the presents I have in mind are simple, but I'm sure they'll mean a lot. I know of this book store near my house, and Laura would just love a copy of Supernatural Wonders. She's totally interested in that sort of thing. I think she wants to investigate things like that when she grows up. I admire her passion, though, I am a bit jealous. She knows exactly what she wants to do, and here I am, absolutely clueless._

_That shouldn't matter now though. I'm only thirteen! Anyway, my gift for Peter is a little more special. I hope the shop is still there. I wanted to get him a locket. It'll be so obvious if I put a picture of us in it, so I'm adding Laura too. We're all best friends after all! He's such a boy - he wouldn't notice anything weird. Though, I know he'll understand it's special. I've been great at keeping my crush on him a secret for almost three years. There's no way I'll slip up now!_

_Dear Diary,_

_I absolutely hate Laura! She went to the Yule ball with Peter, even though she knows how I feel! I mean, yes, I told her I stopped liking him a long time ago, but she should've known that was a lie! I feel so betrayed… She's my best friend! How could she just go with him? I know she said they only went together because they didn't have dates, and it was just as friends, but that's still not okay! Laura knows I'm mad at her, and I guess she told Peter, because he's avoiding me. He's never seen me mad, actually._

_Laura tried reasoning with me, and I guess I am being irrational, but I can't help it. I was so happy when Alexander Lawrence asked me to the ball, even though I never really talked to him. It was a date, and he was very handsome! He's a year older too! That was a big deal. I didn't think it would be anything serious, and Peter wasn't going to ask me anyway. He told me he wanted to ask Hermione Granger! It just broke my heart. I'm so glad she said no, but… seeing his face when he told us, made me feel quite bad. I'm just so confused. I don't know how to feel about anything. I hate the Yule Ball! All it did was cause drama, and now I'm a mess. Peter isn't talking to me, and I'm not talking to Laura, and Alexander was just a one-time date. I told him I wasn't interested in a relationship when he asked, and that was my honest answer. I wish I'd said no to him. I don't care if I was excited about it anymore. That whole ball was just a big mistake._

_Oh drat… This entry isn't making much sense anymore. Perhaps after a good night's rest, I'll feel somewhat better. I just wish Laura didn't share the room with me. I really don't want to speak to her, and Heaven knows she's going to try._

_Dear Diary,_

_As I enter the sixth month of my fifth year, I think of how silly the drama of last year was. Cedric Diggory died in that tournament, and Harry Potter claims Voldemort has returned. That's the scariest thing I've heard since entering Hogwarts. I've heard so much about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, though, I'm not too afraid to say his name. However, I do fear what he can do. I'm a Muggle-born! If Voldemort has risen back in power, I could be killed. I like being a witch! I don't want to have to lose all that I've worked for just because of him! It makes me angry… but the fear equals my anger. I'm not sure how to really handle anything this year. O.W.L.'s are already stressing me, and then Voldemort is another subject I can't help but wonder about._

_Then there's Laura and Peter. Laura and I made up after just a week last year, and Peter started talking to me after the air was cleared. He admitted he felt bad, but didn't get why I was upset about the whole thing. It was a really awkward moment, but I'm glad I told him… some of the truth. I just let him know I felt left out, and I regretted going with Alexander, because I would've had more fun with my friends. Anyway, Laura's dating Seamus Finnigan, and I have no clue how to talk to her anymore. Everything's about Seamus, and I guess I can understand. They just started dating. The problem is, she's feeding off of every word he says, and her view on Harry Potter has done a total one-eighty. I don't like it. I believe Harry! I don't think he'd lie about something like Voldemort. She's talking so badly about him though, and it's vexing. I don't know what to tell her. And Peter! He keeps talking about war, and how he's ready to fight if need be! It just has me worried for him. I'm getting more and more scared as the days pass. Nothing good is coming._

_Gracious, to top all that, I've got so much Quidditch practice! I don't want to quit the team; I love flying too much. My plate is just getting rather full. Lessons are getting harder, Quidditch is taking up time that I could use for homework, and the God damned war everyone keeps claiming is or isn't true! I wish things would calm down for one minute so I could wrap my head around things. I can't even enjoy Hogsmeade anymore! I just wish things would go back to the way they were before life got so hard._

_Dear Diary,_

_Everyone says the fifth year is the hardest, and looking back, I believe they're right. Sixth year is so much more simple. Granted, the spells and lessons are more advanced, but the stress isn't nearly as bad as it was this time last year. Even Laura isn't giving me as hard of time as she was last year. Her and Seamus broke up, and after she finally got over him, she apologized for all of the craziness I had to deal with. I love Laura… It's crazy to think we've watched each other grow. There's so much going on in the world, and I laugh because I can stop, and have moments like this. Moments where I reflect on how wild time is. It just moves, and we have to go along for the ride. I can't believe the changes that I've seen, and… Hogwarts has definitely made me who I am. I like who I am._

_I remember last year when I regretted everything, and couldn't stand myself. It's odd that feelings and thoughts like that didn't come when the dementors were everywhere on the grounds. No… Maybe it was all that talk of war against dark forces that had me cutting down on myself. I've grown out of that phase though, thank Heavens. I finally seem to have gotten back to a good place in life. I couldn't be any more grateful. Anyway, I have exams coming up, and I'm not even worried. I think I can do this. No, no, I know I can. I'm confident lately, and I rather like it. I'm totally going to ace these exams, and I couldn't be more excited. Of course… I guess that doesn't excuse me from studying. I'd probably feel even more certain if I crammed a little bit of review time in my schedule. Since Quidditch is over, I have the time. I can't believe we didn't win the Quidditch Cup! Oh well… There's always next year. Even if we don't win, I'm happy I spent my time on the Quidditch team. I made something of myself, and I'm not just another face in Hogwarts._

_I'm Wendy Lovelace, and people are going to remember me._

_I like the sound of that, honestly. God knows the thought of people adoring me always made me smile. Even just Laura admiring what I do makes me giddy. And Peter? When he compliments me, or commends me on my work, I can barely function the rest of the day. I'm so silly when it comes to him. I mean, I'm the same girl around him, and I love that I can be myself, but my reactions to things with him! I guess this crush won't ever really go away. He'll just be that guy that's always in my heart. I don't mind it. I'll never act on it though. He has a girlfriend this year… Yeah, that certainly broke my heart. Lavender Brown… She seemed nice enough. I guess if Peter's happy, then I'm happy._

_Maybe I'm only able to say that though, because I know Lavender never stays in a relationship for more than two months. One thing's for sure: I'll be there for Peter._

_Now, I should return to studying._

_Dear Diary,_

_Since my first year at Hogwarts, I've had but one crush. I believe now, I can call it love. Peter Woodridge… I can't even begin to describe how perfect he is. I've written many things about him in my last few diaries. Each year the detail becomes more prominent. This year… I don't quite know what it is. I wanted to tell him so bad on the train how I felt, and instead I just blurted out that Flitwick made me Head Girl. I was happy when I got the news, and Peter congratulated me, but I was disappointed in myself for not being able to tell him the truth. Maybe this sudden desire to tell him how I feel is because I know that this is our last year. We've come so far… and now we're in year seven. Everything changed, and I'm not sure how I'm feeling once again._

_Last year, Dumbledore died. The rumor is that Snape killed him. I'm worried about this year at Hogwarts. I have the worst feeling that things are going to be awful. With Snape as Head master, everyone who isn't in Slytherin is going to hate life. I've got N.E.W.T.'s to worry about this year, and I have no idea what'll happen with Quidditch. Will there be a happy moment this year? I don't know. I'm nervous, to be honest, and as I sit here, watching Peter and Laura talk and laugh like everything's fine, I have to wonder how they're feeling._

_I think I'll cut this entry short. I'd rather spend my time happily with my friends, instead of wallowing in this weird haze. I'll take one day at a time. Somehow I'll find the answers._

_Dear Diary,_

_The horribleness that Hogwarts became is suddenly gone. Though, it's not much better at the moment. Our teachers called us all to the Great Hall, and I just knew something was wrong. I had to bring my diary. There was just a feeling I had in the pit of my stomach, and I need my diary as… I guess a security blanket of sorts. Professor McGonagall just informed us that Hogwarts… Well, we're not safe. The war everyone was so scared of is here, and we're under attack. Pansy Parkinson, or however you spell her wretched name, suggested we just hand Harry Potter over! I'm glad she's leaving. Hopefully a curse somehow hits her. I've never wished anything so ill on someone, but she's just a wicked girl. Karma will go around and get her, I suppose. I will not stand for injustice anymore. Not after all I've been through this year._

_The punishments us Muggle-borns faced were horrific. I've got scars on my arms, and the emotional anguish still lingers. However, I won't let anyone hold me down. I'm strong. I'm Wendy Lovelace, and I survived Hogwarts at its' worst. I'm staying to fight in this battle, because I know what I believe in, and I refuse to let it fall to evil. I'm writing now to document the moments before the battle that I know will go down in wizarding history. We cannot lose, and I have faith that we won't. Am I honestly scared? I'm not sure. I can't feel anything at the moment. I just know that I'm ready to fight._

_Peter's staying as well, but Laura decided to leave. I can't blame her. I understand she must be scared. Maybe I am too, somewhere in my heart. I can't let that show. I have to be strong. This is bigger than any exam, or any crush. I'm ready to fight for the good of the wizarding world._

_I must tuck my diary away, and if I lose it during battle, I'll somehow find it later. Right now, my main concern is protecting the ones I love._

**The mixture of overwhelming happiness and misery was strange. I didn't know how to cope with it. Everyone was beside themselves with that feeling of victory, but then there were some who mourned the loss of friends or family. I walked for the longest time, it seemed, stopping only when I was in the Great Hall. Everything was unreal. The life around me happened in slow motion, until I sat down at the Ravenclaw table. I had to bring this particular body back inside, and lay it with the others. I wasn't sure how to start mourning though. I couldn't even believe that I was carrying one of the dead.**

**I sat beside the body, feeling my throat tighten. God knows I wanted to cry. I couldn't though. I needed to be strong. I told myself before the battle started that there was the possibility that this would happen. I just didn't believe it would. I was supposed to protect everyone I loved. I did a hell of a job fighting, but I guess it wasn't enough.**

**Sighing, I read through the diary I held, skimming through it and feeling my heart clench. If only I had said something sooner, perhaps I wouldn't have such regret plaguing me now. I pushed my hair back, feeling a tear slide down the bridge of my nose as I looked down at the body of my best friend - the love of my life. The tear fell, splattering on the last entry in the diary.**

**Perhaps someday I would move on from this loss, but at the moment, I couldn't believe what I'd lost. I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to do anything but cry. I had to keep myself together though. Something kept me from really letting go and weeping like I wanted to. Maybe it was the fact that I knew the love I'd lost wouldn't want me to cry. I had to stay strong, and keep moving. The more I thought of this, the more tears swelled up in my eyes. I would regret not admitting my love for a long time - perhaps the rest of my life. I would miss the hell out of my best friend, but I knew I couldn't linger on it. There was so much in life we were destined to do. I had hoped, if luck was in my favor, we would get married. If not, we had lives we were supposed to go on and lead. Now… only I would be going on.**

"**Excuse me?" a voice snapped me out of my thoughts, and I quickly wiped my eyes, looking up to see Professor McGonagall. She stared down at me with pity, holding a roll of parchment and quill in her hands. "I'm sorry… This must have been someone close to you." I nodded, swallowing the lump in my throat. "Please, could you give me the name of the deceased? I need record of it…" She sounded regretful for having to ask me questions while I was mourning, but clearly she could see I was well enough to do the simple task for her. I nodded yet again, sniffing and clearing my throat.**

**Quickly, I stared down at the body, letting go of as much of the sadness as I could. I had to stay strong.**

"**Wendy Lovelace." I answered, feeling the ache in my heart at the mention of her. Professor McGonagall wrote down the name, then looked back at me.**

"**And yours?" she questioned, obviously not in her right mind. She knew me well, but at the moment, everything was too hectic to really remember names. I didn't blame her. She had hundreds of other students, and we had just defeated a horde of Death Eaters, and the Dark Lord himself.**

"**Peter." I replied. "Peter Woodridge."**


End file.
